


Unraveling With Every Word

by freakingdork



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Angst, Episode Tag, Episode: s05e01 Nameless Faceless, HIV/AIDS, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-23
Updated: 2012-06-23
Packaged: 2017-11-08 09:38:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/441811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freakingdork/pseuds/freakingdork
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Morgan and Reid both test positive for HIV, jealousy and paranoia run rampant looking for a cause that turns out to be far simpler and innocent than either of them would have thought. 5x01 AU. From the worst case scenario meme on tumblr.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unraveling With Every Word

“I'm sorry Derek, but I have to inform you that while most of your tests came back normal, your HIV test was positive.”

Morgan stared at his doctor in disbelief.

This wasn't happening, this _couldn't_ be happening. He and Reid had just been tested last year after Reid nearly died of anthrax and they decided they didn't want to use condoms anymore. Despite the number of partners he'd had, Morgan always got regular STD testing prior to being with Reid and he'd only ever forgone protection with Reid after they were sure they were disease free. There was always a chance in their line of work that they could get infected, which is why he'd opted for another test with his yearly physical.

So that must be it. Work, not Reid cheating or Reid shooting up. Definitely work.

Even if he couldn't think of when that would have happened.

***

“Spencer, we need to talk,” Morgan said, pushing the paper with his results across the table.

Reid looked down at the paper, up at Morgan, and then back at the paper again.

“But...how?”

“I don't know baby,” he said. He didn't want to ask, but he needed to. “You haven't...?”

“No! Absolutely not Derek. You?”

Morgan shook his head. Reid's eyes narrowed anyway and Morgan didn't like that look at all.

“Hopefully, it's recent and it hasn't...” Morgan said, drifting off.

Sorrow and regret reflected back at him and he hated himself just a little for preferring it to Reid's suspicion.

***

When his test came back positive too, Reid could hardly believe it. Before they'd first been tested, he'd been off Dilaudid for a year and a half and hadn't had sex with anyone other than Morgan for a year. Logically, it seems like neither of them should have had a false negative with the first test and he'd done nothing risky in the year since the initial test. _Nothing._ He hadn't even gotten a blood transfusion when he'd been shot.

But Morgan still treated him with skepticism. As upsetting as it was, Reid was convinced that he'd be suspicious if he were in Morgan's shoes and thus, couldn't really blame him for his disbelief.

The phantom of his past addiction was always there, so it wasn't surprising when he came home to find that Morgan had searched the whole house; Reid probably wouldn't have even noticed, except there were a few things out of place. He'd also spent a day alone with Ethan when he was in town for a gig about six months ago and Morgan knew about their shared past - everything from Ethan's alcohol and drug abuse to the sex that hadn't always involved condoms. Add in the knowledge that Ethan's moral compass was a little lacking and cheating didn't sound like a very farfetched explanation, even though Reid knew in his heart that he hadn't and couldn't.

Hell, Reid could admit that he was a bit suspicious of Morgan himself; Morgan had a few “late nights” at the office a couple months back. Reid never would have chalked them up to an affair - Morgan was a serial monogamist, not a cheater - but because Reid had ruled out so many risk factors on his end, it was hard not to wonder. Perhaps Morgan had lied about his past usage of protection.

Maybe, maybe, maybe...his mind started running scenarios, each one worse than the next.

And then Tamara Barnes was someone he couldn't get out of his head.

***

Morgan felt the weight of cynicism and possible betrayal and the ensuing distrust breaking them apart and he couldn't seem to stop it; he found himself unable to believe a thing that came out of Reid's mouth, no matter how much he wanted to.

He'd always thought they could weather anything together.

But he was wrong, Morgan knew as he barely dodged the coffee mug Reid had flung at his head. The paranoia gotten to them both, accusations flew from both sides, and neither was admitting to any wrongdoing. 

It only took three months after Reid's positive test for them to break up, for Reid to move out.

***

Attempting to stand up from the round table, Reid's knee twinged. As he grasped it with a hand, an image came to him.

Dr. Barton, hands covered in the unsub's blood, pressing down on his knee.

He couldn't breathe.

Initially, they'd tried going through the cases they'd worked, looking for times either of them could have come into contact with an unsub's blood and drew a blank. There was nothing, they'd been sure, but now Reid saw where they went wrong. Morgan was only pulling up to the scene when Dr. Barton had accidentally transferred the blood and Reid had immediately told them something happened to Hotch. There was too much happening, too much distracting both of them. If he'd known, if he'd realized, Reid could have at least gotten a round of anti-virals and maybe...maybe this wouldn't have happened.

But then another thought caught his attention, this one much more devastating - he'd been infected less than a week after their tests had come back negative. If they hadn't made the decision, Reid might have been the only one affected.

Reid wanted to speak up, apologize for all the horrible things he said and tell Morgan that they'd both been wrong, but he knew it was too late. There was no way Morgan would believe him now.


End file.
